Drunken Reactions
by FHT3rdandCo
Summary: A party at Shikamaru's, guys only. Some blood spilled, some fun conversations, all in all, a pleasant gettogether. Well... if they manage to find the body, that is. [AU, random, fun, OneShot?]


((A/N: So I felt like writing about a drunken party with the Naruto guys… X3 it was all for the cause.

Burbs: …what cause?

Muse: The one that I write! Now silence, y-you… insolent person, you…

Burbs: That was kinda lame, sorry to break it to ya Muse-chan, but you're losing your touch.

Muse: …liar, since when are you ever sorry when it comes to causing me pain in any way, shape or form?

Burbs: …touché. X3

And that was how it all happened…))

* * *

**Drunken Reactions**

Talking when drunk had never been something he enjoyed doing. He disliked speaking for the most part unless it was his usual random complaints.

When he drank, he did it to _relax_, not to converse about his deepest fears or his opinion on certain girls.

"Come _on_ Sasuke-teme! There has got to be _some_ girl you like!"

Sasuke glared at the Uzumaki before taking another shot of Sake, "No."

Shikamaru sighed, _why_ wouldn't they leave him be and let him drink in _peace_?

Naruto turned to face where Shikamaru and Neji were seated, "What 'bout you two?"

Neji choked on his drink; apparently he wasn't a subtle drunk.

Naruto's fox like grin only grew, "Oh, this is priceless! So who is it?"

Neji avoided eye contact, "No one." His reply was far too stiff sounding for even the dense Uzumaki not to notice he was lying.

Kiba grinned as well, coming up beside Naruto and interrogating the Hyuuga prodigy.

"Is it… Ino?!"

Shikamaru almost choked on his drink but was not the type to fall for petty tricks like that. Though it annoyed him for them to say that, Ino was _far_ from a good match for Neji.

…in his opinion at least.

Neji said nothing.

Kiba and Naruto only looked a little put out at having guessed wrong, but quickly regained composure "Tenten?!"

"Yes. It's Tenten."

The two only looked satisfied with his answer for a second… _before_ they realized that he was most obviously lying just to get him off his case.

Kiba turned to Naruto, "I'm out of ideas."

Naruto sighed, almost as if defeated, "I think I may be as well…"

Disappointed, the drunken duo rounded on Chouji.

Shikamaru let out another deep sigh, he'd have to save his best friend… but the Uchiha was trying to escape…

Eyes narrowed, Shikamaru quickly decided that if _he_ had to suffer this damn torture, so did the Uchiha!

…it had _nothing_ to do with the small vendetta he held against the solemn boy.

Right…

Seconds later, Naruto and Kiba whirled away from the now terrified fa-_chubby_ boy to look at the source of the cry.

"LET ME GO SHIKAMARU! I ALMOST _ESCAPED_ DAMNIT!"

He'd never imagined Sasuke was the _loud_ sort of drunk.

It was quite a bit of rough-housing later that the boys finally sat back once more for more… 'civilized' conversation.

A snicker, "Neji's a chicken-butt."

A growl of annoyance, "I'm not the one that resembles a bird butt…"

A raised eyebrow, "Are you suggesting that my _hair_…-?"

"Yes Uchiha."

"Oh you are going _down_!"

Shikamaru looked at the abysmal scene between his fingers; they were going to utterly destroy his apartment…

"So… what do you think of Sakura-san from sales?"

Shikamaru turned to look at the previously quiet boy; Haku's question remained in the air for him to answer.

"She's… troublesome."

"Oh."

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow, Haku was acting weird…

"Are you drunk _already_?"

"No, no… just… ohhh! Look at the pretty flowers!"

"Um… Haku… there are no flowers…"

Haku blinked with hazy eyes, "Mmm?"

Oh yes, he was _definitely_ wasted.

"So… do you like Sakura?"

Haku sent him a confused look. "Why would you think that?"

"Well… you _did_ bring her up…"

"I did?"

Kiba watched the conversation with only mild interest before interjecting with his juicy piece of information, "I thought he liked Tayuya."

Shikamaru choked, "_Tayuya_? Otougure _Tayuya_?! _That_ psycho?!"

Haku let out a dreamy sigh and fainted.

Kiba, Chouji and Shikamaru looked on with slight surprise.

"Well, I don't suppose we'll ever know now." Chouji commented as Haku giggled in his sleep.

"…creepy…" Kiba said.

"I thought he was a girl." Sasuke interjected.

They all turned to face the worse-for-the-wear Sasuke, apparently his little tiff with Neji had resulted in blood… they just weren't sure which one of them were bleeding.

"We could find out." Neji added, sitting down with the others.

Shikamaru blinked, '_…three… four… five. Now that's not right… who are we missing?_' "Where's Naruto?"

Neji and Sasuke chuckled ominously.

There was suddenly little question who the blood belonged to.

Kiba coughed awkwardly, "I'll… go look for the body…"

The others(besides Sasuke and Neji) nodded quickly.

"That'd be a good idea." Shikamaru said.

* * *

((Ending Notes: So… what do ya think? Should I update? Write more of the hilarious goodness, possibly some drunk Naru-girls as well?

Burbs: It's pointless, you're not going to get any reviews anyway.

Muse: Why are you always so mean? This is about that time I cut off your finger, isn't it?

Burbs: Oh gee, you think?!

Muse: …I said I was sorry.

-Muse-chan bickering mindlessly with Burbs.))


End file.
